| Aug. 2nd, 2011 @ 02:17 am im bullshit edit |
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i hate that this post looks like me whining about being poor, when its more about how i use my self worth that has nothing to do with money, but i feel like its an uphill struggle because all anyone cares about is money
but its really only that way when i think about my ex
i think what i wasreally feeling is how i make everyone close to me miserable in the end and wanted a roundabout way of not blaming myself for it
so hey! BLAME MONEY
ughhhhh what the fuck am i doing, why did i date someone who is into buying four hundred and fifty dollar shoes, when while i was dating them they SCOFFED at someone who would spend 100 dollars on custom shoes and 150 dollars on a sweatshirt
why did i think i could change them
why did i want to change them
everyones entitled to their material nonsense and i just felt above taht whats wrong with me
why do i have frineds that make 150 dollars an hour
why do i know people who can go into a store with 10 articles in it and get a custom tailored shirt and go gaga over a BUSINESS CARD HOLDER; ive never had a fucking buisiness card except when i was on the youth commission and we all had communal cards, AND THAT WAS WHEN I WAS 16
i fucking go into a thrift store and feel alienated
what the fuck am i doing really
like what buisiness do i have even talking to these people
all my friends are rich and why am i even here
like ma'am gets money from her last game and we can go and buy FURNITURE and thats an exciting moment, while all of my friends are bragging about their newest accessories
i just feel really alienated and out of place with everything my friends are doing
why do i relate to people who are in magazines and have careers and i cant even get a job as a dog trainer
why do i pride myself on being inspiring when i cant even make a name for myself
whine whine whine
whine to the max |
